Around the time this gets publish it is about two years since I started my program and I’m about to enter year three with a bit of hesitancy. The past year, both professionally and personally, has been a year of tremendous growth. Much like my post last year, there were some major lessons that I know I’ll take as I move forward with my personal wild west known as academia.
Lesson 1: Don’t beat yourself up
When it came to parts of my professional life, as a doctoral student, I found myself having to experience a large amount of change. My comprehensive exams did not go as well as expected, and I also ended up changing advisors as my current advisor, Judy, embarked on her long-awaited retirement. During those moments, I did end up on a mild spiral, especially when I thought my life in this field was over as I knew it. I also felt a bit lost with Judy leaving, as we ended up forming a great working relationship and struck up quite a friendship as well. She always looked out for me, and with her leaving BC, I felt quite isolated. The doctoral student journey is already a lonely one, even when surrounded by social support, so when you’re feeling loneliness on top of all this, you inevitably beat yourself up. However, thanks to the wonders of therapy, as well as some exceptionally long bike rides and chats with newfound mentor figures, and, of course, Erin, I reached a new state of clarity. A point where I could honestly reflect on myself and think, yes, I know I made mistakes, but I do have opportunities to learn and rectify them, and that in the grand scheme of things, it’s not the worst thing in the world. I am also happy to report that Judy and I still catch up every now and then over meals, and they have been quite a highlight of the summer. This reflection of clarity brings me on to my next lesson.
Lesson 2: Celebrate each and every single victory no matter how small.
We do not often celebrate the little things during this crazy time as doctoral students and ultimately that can lead to our detriment. Professional and personal goals should be celebrated in one form or another. I sadly did not come to this realization till a speaker event we had at Boston College, where, in a session with the faculty speaker and the PhD students, she asked us a simple question, “When was the last time you celebrated an accomplishment, be it personal or professional?” What shook me was how no one raised their hand in the room, me included. It serves as a stark reminder that these small victories can have a profound impact on our own mental well-being. I got to celebrate some brilliant milestones in my professional and personal life. I managed to complete my first draft of my third-year paper, and it was accepted in the form of poster and paper presentations at multiple conferences, including our big conference, the Academy of Management. In my personal life, I crossed a significant milestone, the big 30, had some long overdue reunions with old friends, spent some quality time with family and moved in with Erin (easily one of the best achievements of this past year). It brings me on to my final lesson.
Lesson 3: Try to have a colossal amount of fun on the way
While this might be a reused lesson from last year, I can safely say that it still remains true. This time, however, what I have realized is that I need to stick to this lesson more closely. There is a lot of fun to be had within the mad rigors of a doctoral program. For instance, I started a new research project with some brilliant collaborators, and there is renewed excitement in this field. It is a feeling I have not had since I first entered the program. In addition, when attending the most recent iteration of the Academy of Management Conference in Copenhagen, Denmark, I discovered a new joy in running to explore the city. Amidst all the conference events, I made some new friends along the way. Between work and life, I found myself making time for social events, as there needs to be a decent balance between work and personal life. Perhaps it is why I am now drawn to this scholarship, as it pertains very much to my own struggles.
On the whole, the renewed energy I was missing this past year has returned. I feel a sense of gratitude to the people I care deeply about for helping me stay true to my path. Moreover, I am also grateful for their patience with me as I figure out the next steps for making the most of the coming year. All that is left to say is, bring on year 3.
Thank you for sharing your reflections, Nitin ! I appreciated learning more about the challenges faced while working on a PhD, and particularly your process of how you navigated some of the different challenges you were experiencing.
What an insightful reflection on your PhD journey! Thank you for sharing this honest view of life as a PhD student. I think that many of these lessons are useful for all of us in academia. Best of luck with the next steps of your journey.